Hello everyone. I trust your week has been amazing. Today we will conclude the story of Adesola and her life experiences living with a son who is autistic but blessed. Sit back, relax and enjoy. Stay Sparkling.
S.A.B: You wrote a book which tells us all about what you have been through, a full story on Ade and your experiences. What made you decide to write it and what impact do you think this book will have on those who read it?
Adesola: For a long time, I teased Ade that one day, I would sit down and write books about the rollercoaster of emotions I experienced raising him. I wanted to document these emotions and experiences in a book but the realities of running a home limited the time available to write. As a result of some series of events, I realised that my story could help other parents and carers navigating the often confusing world of raising children diagnosed with autism. I just knew I had to put pen to paper. It is therefore my desire that the words contained in my book brings hope and courage to people’s hearts and mind whether they are raising a child diagnosed with autism or facing other challenges.
S.A.B: Would you like to tell us how you came to writing the poem “YES HE WILL”? ( See link to the poem featured in 2019 –https://www.isparklenow.com/2019/11/16/yes-he-will/ )
Adesola: When Ade was in year 2, we moved him because his sister had to move ( the school they were got to only up to year 2) and without due diligence in regards to the suitability of the school for Ade, we moved him because we had found the school a good match for his sister. unfortunately the two years Ade spent at the school was a living nightmare. All efforts to colloborate with the school to resolve issues were fruitile. We decided to move to another borough with the hope of getting Ade into a better educational placement which turned out to be another disaster. Ade was left stuck at home for two years.
As I pondered on all the educational challenges he was facing, I became determined that his diagnosis with autism should not stop him from becoming someone great.” NO” being out of school for two years should not stop him achieving greatness and “YES” with the right support Ade would live a fruitful and fulfilling life. I decided to give him homeschooling while we tried to get him a suitable school. I also chose to believe in Ade just like any other child whether neurotypical and neurodiverse, has a right to maximise his talents and potentials. All of these, brought about the poem.
S.A.B: What can you tell other parents struggling with the same or similar challenges as you have?
Adesola: Sometimes we don’t get a quick fix to our challenges. with Ade I subconsciously imagined that a visit or two to the specialists was going to instantly provide me with an understanding of what was going on with him and magically make it all go away, I was wrong. It took time to understand. I will encourage parents and carers to give it time, do your best to get the necessary support for your child in the meantime. Seeking early intervention makes a lot of difference as evidence shows that early access to evidence-based interventions is crucial to achieving more favourable life outcomes for a child with autism. So, seek help if you think there may be something not quite right with your child and don’t be concerned about what people may say. In all of this, do not neglect your health which tends to be put on the backburner when you have a child with autism. Remember the advice given in the aeroplane is that if there is an emergency, you put on your oxygen mask before putting one on your child.
Information is power, and knowledge gives hope. It is important to get knowledgeable about autism, attend conferences, get involved with support groups, find out about the support available and be aware of false claims. Most importantly, believe in your child. Many children with autism are like a rose unfolding its petals as so much abilities lies within the disabilities which with the right support will be of benefit to many. In a bid to help them overcome their weaknesses, do not forget to see their strengths which may be staring at you in the face.
S.A.B: What do you do for fun? Any hobbies to relax and refresh you?
Adesola: I like to write, read, stringing beads and meeting people from all works of life.
S.A.B: What are your plans for the future?
Adesola: I plan to continue my research into autism and how people on the spectrum can thrive and live an independent and fulfilling life. I also plan to share my knowledge with parents, carers and professionals whenever I get the opportunity to do so.
If you would like to reach out to Adesola, here is a link to her website: https://sites.google.com/view/adesolatoyinadesokan/home
Also if you would like to buy her book “Sailing on a rainbow. A colourful journey with autism”, you can follow some of the links below. Please do leave a review when you read the book.
E-book – https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08NWZRM9J